Free Hugs

    Tomorrow, at 3:30 IN THE MORNING, I arrive at the MPLS airport. My destination? San Antonio, Texas, home of the Alamo, the Alamo Dome, and this years Lutheran National Youth Gathering. Tens of thousands of kids from across the United States will gather in one city to worship, learn about God, and serve the community together. It's going to be fantastic.

    I attended the last Youth Gathering in New Orleans. I was a little freshman who didn't know the next thing about socializing with my peers. The vast crowds of other teenagers intimidated me. Everywhere I looked there was either some beautiful girl or some weird looking guy I didn't want to know or some adult that looked out of place amongst the throng of youngsters.

                                                                                                image: thinksquad.net

It was like this, only with infinitely more hormones. 

    However, there was one stupid little trend that was happening that helped me come out of my shell and become the slightly more extroverted introvert that I am today. There were these guys with signs that said "Free Hugs." They were all over the place. Every day I'd see more and more of them.

    That's it. It wasn't some lesson by a famous speaker that inspired me to be more open to people. It wasn't some spiritual revelation, either. It was just these dudes with signs.

    I've always enjoyed a good hug, no matter who is giving it. For me, hugs are a way for people to say whatever I need to hear at the time, even if they have no idea that I am even struggling with something. Hugs are a universal way of saying, "I'm right here if you need me." Plus, they just feel really nice.

    I decided to make my own "Free Hugs" sign, because I lack originality and there were a lot of cute girls. That day, I got dozens of hugs from strangers from all walks of life. I quickly realized that this whole "interacting with strangers" thing wasn't nearly as horrifying as I had originally thought it might be. I didn't get as many hugs from cute girls as I had originally planned, but that selfish reasoning had fallen by the wayside. I was now in it for the feels. The feels you get when you make someone else feel happy. 

                                                            image: theturtlehairandprincess.com

"You aren't terrible, and I appreciate your existence."
"Aw! Thanks friend!"

    My cause did eventually become a contest between my female friend and I to see who could get the most hugs in a day. She won because she's a girl and guys are lame. However, I had decided that for the next Youth Gathering, things would be different. I would try to change people's lives in the way mine was changed during that wonderful week.

    Over the past few years I have obtained many close friends who like hugging nearly as much as I do. Most of my friends, male or female, have so much affection for one another that we don't care how stupid we look when we express it. My guy friends and I often start our conversations with, "I love you.", and it isn't awkward and no one goes, "Lol, gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay." It's just how we talk. We genuinely love each other. And we hug. All. The. Time.

    I really am blessed to have such wonderful friends, but some people don't have those kinds of supportive and caring relationships. Many people out there never, ever get hugged, and that makes me sad. Which is why I am making it my mission to go out of my way to hug people. I even made a t-shirt!

Front

Back

    Now, one of my friends raised a legitimate point. He told me that I'm not the first guy to come up with this idea of "Free Hugs". "No offense," he said, "but you know that girls find 'those' people to be annoying and creepy, and the real reason guys do that is because they just want to feel a girl..."

    Sadly, yes, there are a lot of those douchebags out there who only want hugs from cute girls. I already admitted that that is how I started out, and I totally feel embarrassed by it. And I realize that a lot of people will probably see me wearing the shirt and be put off by it. I'll get weird looks and raised chins, and many people will feel indignant towards me.

    And you know what? That's okay. If I make only ONE person's day?. I'll feel validated. If I change ONe person's life? It'll  be the best decision I ever made.

    If you really think about it, that's what Christians are called to do. We are called to share Christ's love no matter what people think of us. I will be surrounded on all sides by fellow Christians of the same denomination as me, and I'll still probably be looked down upon. Lutheran's, especially LCMS Lutherans, are not really known for their free-spiritedness.

    Now, this is where I ask you people out there to try my little love experiment. Whether you are on your way to the Youth Gathering, or are reading this after the fact, or, most likely, you are not involved with it whatsoever, I call on YOU to give a genuine hug today. And tomorrow. And forever.

    You don't need a nice little t-shirt to give hugs. Just do it. Do it because you care. Do it because you love people. Do it because hugs feel nice and everyone deserves to feel nice every once in awhile.

"We love because He first loved us." 1 John 4:19

                                                                          image: preciseisnice.blogspot.com

Ask Me Anything!

    Hello friends! I have been wondering exactly what I should do to keep this blog going. Not that I'm running out of ideas, per se, I simply want to keep it fresh. I don't want to just have a bunch of sequels and series occasionally parted by originality.

    So, after much deliberation, I decided that simply being more original was too much work.

    "What can I do to create both original content and content that people would actually want to read?" I asked myself.

    "But of course! CROWDSOURCING!" I enthusiastically responded.

                                                                                          image: socialmediatoday.com

Any one of them is more qualified than me for any number of things. All of them together would be almost too much competency for this blog to handle.

    Therefore, dear readers, I have decided to answer questions. Any questions. I'll split them into two groups: Multiple short responses in one post, and more deliberate and lengthy responses to a single question in one post.

    Basically, the fun, short, silly questions get grouped together and exterminated at once. The big, meaty, more serious questions will be taken apart piece by piece, one at a time.

    Send me questions on Facebook, or email, or in the comments of this post, and any questions posts that follow. You don't have to tell me if you want it to be anonymous, I'll keep all of them anonymous. Just for sanity's sake.

    Yeah. That's it. Please actually send me questions, even if they are silly. I will answer all of them, as long as they are appropriate, until such a time when I receive so many thousands upon thousands of urgent queries that I can simply no longer answer "What's the weather like?" or "Can you lick your elbow?"

    P.S.
    The weather is cold and wet, and no, I can not. Can you?

Random Confessions #2

    - I can totally believe it's not butter

    - My grad party is in two days, and other than clean my room a bit, I have done almost no preparing. My parents are amazing.

    - I think people that have watched more than one full season of Dr. Who and still do not like it either have bad taste in television or are part Dalek.

    - I have multiple unfinished or barely even started posts (Gaming Nostalgia Part 2, Apologetics Part 2, and many more) that I haven't finished because they are too hard. I have no idea when I shall finish them. IF you've been checking frequently to find any one post in particular, you can simmer down a bit...it could be awhile.

    - I used to be embarrassed by my last name, but I kind of like it now, because I realize that it makes other people uncomfortable that they find it funny, but are too polite to say anything about it. Hickey. HICKEY. HICKEEEEEY! Also, it's Irish, and Ireland is awesome.

    - I'm only writing this to procrastinate on the aforementioned difficult, unfinished posts.

    - I have a back-scratcher that looks like a tiger. I am using it right now. Be jealous.

    - I am terrible with money. I blame that partly on my generosity, and partly on how I was trained by games like Red Dead Redemption and Skyrim. In real life, I am not a badass cowboy or a nigh-unkillable demigod, and I do not get into fights with lawmen and bandits every few minutes, and therefore I do not have bodies to loot and make cash off of. I sometimes forget this, and blow a ton of money. That's my story, and I'm sticking with it.

    - If I ever meet the guy who does the Spotify ads in real life, I'm going to punch him in the face. I'm sure he's a nice guy, but still...ugh.

    - I have mowed the lawn barefoot multiple times. That's right, dad. And I still stand by my believe that it is no more dangerous with shoes on. I was tempted to write an entire rant on this the other day, and give it it's own post. I still might.

    - I've been known to walk on the left side of the stairs, even when other people are coming down. Sometimes things don't always go the way you want, and you just have to get out of the way.

    - I'm German and Irish and I hate the taste of beer.

    - I'm the one who let the dogs out.

    - We got rid of my sister's rabbit because nobody wanted to take care of it anymore. I'm not even remotely sad about it.

    - I once snorted an entire Pixie Stick - one of the long one - for five dollars. My nose bled for hours.

    - If you tell me you enjoy getting drunk or high, I automatically assume I'm a little bit smarter than you.

I Changed The Layout...Again.

    I'm so sorry. I don't know what is wrong with me.

    Eventually, I'll settle on something that I like. But for now...the sidebar is on the left, and all the little buttons at the bottom are in a different order. God help us all...

    Look, it's me and Danny DeVito!

He's so short!

    Uhhhhhhh, yeah. That's all I got. 

What To Do If You're Secretly A Jerk

    

    Forward, photos, captions, and blog by Chris Hickey. Actual article by the brilliant and lovely Kyleen Russell. 

***

    Do you ever think condescending thoughts about people when they're trying their hardest at something? Do you assume mental superiority over someone because of what they wear, listen to, or do for fun? Do you continually find yourself wishing people would just shut up and do it your (clearly superior) way? If you've answered yes to any or all of these questions, than you, dear reader, are probably an asshole jerk.

    Just kidding. What it really means is that you are a sinful human being (or, if you're not religious, it just means you're human and therefore not perfect), and at least you're keeping it to yourself. I hope.

                                                                                                image: timberry.bplans.com

"I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU! WEIRDOS"

"..."
"I meant, 'You're all really unique in ways that are different than me, and I appreciate that about all of you.'"

    But how do we change, or at least control, these negative thoughts and emotions? How do we stop being secretly horrible people? Or, if we can't and a bad thought slips out for everyone to hear, what can disguise our obviously abhorrent inner attitude?

    I have no idea. Originally, I wrote a list of silly, obviously fake tips on how to be a less horrible person, concluding with the message, "Don't try to fake it; just focus on being better.". However, after reading and rereading what Kyleen wrote, I decided it would be better for her chunk of our coauthored masterpiece to be the main focus, because not only is it wonderfully written, but it also takes a much more contemplative approach to the topic of our inner demons of pride and vulgar frames of mind.

    So, without further ado...

***

    Imagine if your thoughts were amplified for the world to hear.

    How majorly would that suck, right? Oh, how we fear transparency.

    We scramble through the labyrinth that is social tact, pining to appear likable and nice—but let’s face it. Half the time, we say nice things while actually thinking rude, degrading thoughts.

    Externally, you could be the sweetest, most gracious person on the planet, but explore the inner neighborhood of your body, locate the address of your soul and ring the doorbell—you’ll probably be greeted by a chauvinistic smart-ass. Why? Because even the “nicest” people are often mean and rude…at least in the privacy of their head. Even Mother Teresa was probably a bitch.

                                                                                                            image: time.com

Pharisee.

    Wait, what?

    It boils down to human nature; we have rudeness ingrained in our DNA. However, I am in no way condoning this. It would be absurd to nonchalantly accept and be content with all terrible things simply because they’re inherently human. That’s such a cop-out. Like, “Mass genocide and female-genital-mutilation and rape and nuclear wars really suck. But, hey, it’s human nature! We can’t do anything about it. Oh well!”

    But anyways, what is the point of saying something if our thoughts don’t truly align with it? We have grown complacent with our external, insincere kindness and internal rudeness.

    How many times do we give a hollow compliment, simply in hopes of being perceived as a kind person?

    External: “Oh my gosh, you look so great! Where did you get that outfit? It’s terrific!”

    Internal: “Oh my god, is Hellen Keller your stylist? I would never wear that in a million years.

 
    Giving dishonest compliments for the sake of appearing “nice” is…well, not nice.

 
    (And it’s not better to say the offensive thing you’re thinking just for honesty’s sake. The goal is to transform your offensive thought into a genuinely kind thought.)

                                                                                                       image: fit.webmd.com

"Hey dweeb! I like your sweater! It counteracts your lameness!"

Eh...good try.

    How often do we feign concern/sympathy for people and their struggles—simply scraping together some cliché advice and perhaps adding “I’ll totally be praying for you” for good measure—when REALLY we think, “Well, it’s not my fault they’re in this mess. Maybe if they weren't such a retarded crackhead whore they wouldn't have so many issues. Besides, I can’t really do anything to help” and then fail to ACTUALLY pray for them?

    So why do we pretend to be kind? How can we be GENUINE? How can we say loving things and actually mean them sans any hidden rude thoughts?

    Or does the inherent hypocrisy, rudeness, and passive-aggression of mankind conquer everyone—even the people who are seemingly sweet and sincere? Is there a way to synchronize one’s thoughts and words?

                                                                                       image: wannabehacks.co.uk

 
    For people who don’t possess the power of the Holy Spirit, probably not. They can try and try and try and try (times infinity) to overcome their corrupt mind, but they will fail. They can gargle the mantra: “I will not think bad thoughts. I will not think bad thoughts” in their mouths forever, but they will fail.

    It cannot be accomplished by human strength. However, if we DO know the Holy Spirit, there is a solution; there is hope. Only through the Holy Spirit’s power can we genuinely be kind and rid ourselves of offensive, hypocritical thoughts.

    The Bible tells us to take every thought captive: “We break down every thought and proud thing that puts itself up against the wisdom of God. We take hold of every thought and make it obey Christ.” (2 Corinthians 10: 5 NLV)

    The Bible commands us to think on things that are true, right, and pure. (Philippians 4:8)

    The Bible commands us to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. (Romans 12: 1)

    So, I am not writing this to encourage distrust of people who compliment you or listen to your problems. That’s not the point. There are plenty of people who daily, moment-by-moment, ask the Holy Spirit to purify their thoughts and, as a result of that, actually mean the kind things they say. I just want to be one of those people, and you probably do too. Please. Understand that I am NOT promoting cynicism.

    I am simply discussing this because I know for a fact everyone struggles with it, and I want to remind/challenge people to surrender their thoughts to God. The mind is so freaking important.

    Basically, hypocrisy blows.

 
    Perhaps we should try to be genuinely kind.

                                                                                                                              image: farm5.staticflickr.com

Or, if that's too hard, you can always just live as a nomad. If there's no people around, how can you be mean to anyone?
Oh, who am I kidding. You're human. You'll find a way.

What's the Deal With Mormons, Anyway?

    My goal with this article is not to insult Mormonism, but to show why I would never believe it, and why maybe - just maybe - Christianity is preferable.

***

    

    Are Mormons Christians? They say they are! So why shouldn't they be? They believe in Jesus, and that he  is the son of God, and that he died for our sins...and that he came to North America after he was resurrected? What? 

                                       image: theflagpole.com

It looked exactly like this.

    Mormons are people. Usually, they are wonderful people. They are kind, loving, and according to their commercials, they do many things that other humans do like art and ride bikes to work and tell jokes. One of my very favorite musicians of all time is a Mormon. The United States almost had a Mormon President! 

    The one thing that I've yet to hear a Mormon admit in any one of their public appearances or commercials is that they are aware of and accept the many contradictions between their core beliefs and history. 

     The New Testament is the most historically reliable collection of ancient texts that exists. It contains hundreds, possibly thousands verified eyewitness accounts of the events it describes. It is all written by either first or second generation storytellers and shows no evidence of legendary development, and because it is written so early, it is nearly inconceivable that any legendary development could have occurred. It contains numerous references to historically known people and places, and there are numerous other ancient works which confirm the existence of the people and places within (there are just as many secular ancient authors who reference Jesus as there are secular ancient authors who mention Tiberius Caesar, the Roman Emperor at the time of Jesus).

    Also, we have thousands of fragments that add up to many whole New Testaments that date back to within a few hundred years of the original manuscripts. These fragments come from multiple places across the Middle East (one of the earliest writings was found in Egypt). They have all been copied with immense precision, with almost no errors to be found anywhere, including things like spelling and punctuation. This is very important, because we know the Bible exists.

                                                                                                              image: seanmcdaniel100.wordpress.com

    The Book of Mormon is said to have been translated from Revised Egyptian (a language that shows no evidence of having ever existed) by one man, Joseph Smith. He is said to have found it on some golden plates in a hill near his home in New York after being led to them by the angel Moroni (who took them back to heaven with him when Joseph was done translating, because of course he did). There were exactly 11 witnesses that said that the plates existed, the Three Witnesses and the Eight Witnesses (all of the first three took back their affirmation during Joseph's lifetime, although two did claim to go back to Mormonism before they died). There are no outside sources, or archaeological evidence, to confirm any of the people or places in the Book of Mormon that are not from the Bible. 

    Not to mention the numerous and somewhat massive incongruities between the Bible and the Book of Mormon. The style of writing is much more similar to Renaissance or even 18th/19th century literature. It references animals and technologies that did not exist in America at the time. Even though most in the LDS church would view the Book of Mormon as a history of the Native Americans, all genetic evidence points to most Native American peoples having originated somewhere in Russia, not the Middle East. 

                                                                   image: twincities.com

But look at how nice and well dressed he is! Surely he speaks truth!

    I've tried to read the Book of Mormon multiple times, and it always give me a headache. Literally. I actually get headaches from reading it. It's like a bad fan fiction of the Bible! Everything is kinda similar, but it's written so horribly that it is clear to me that God would not let it be his representation of Himself to humanity.

    I don't believe the Bible because I'm a Christian; I'm a Christian because I believe the Bible. That's the key difference between blindly following and intrinsically understanding. If anyone can show me a way to reconcile the incongruities between the two texts, then give me a reason to believe that the Book of Mormon is necessary as apposed to just believing the Bible, and show me historical evidence for the narrative told in the Book of Mormon, then they will be the person who has a chance of converting me to their religion. 

                                                                   image: twincities.com

And they won't get to me through this guy.

    And yes, Mormonism IS a different religion. There is no getting around that. Mormonism has many doctrinal differences that set it apart, such as...

    - They reject the Holy Trinity; God, Jesus, and the Holy Ghost are three separate "spirit beings" who are "one in purpose".

    

    - They believe we were all once "spirit beings", and that when we die we go to the spirit world until the Resurrection, where we will be reunited with our bodies.

    - They believe that all receive a second chance after death, during a period of  "learning and preparation", and that even most people do not go to Hell forever, but only for a short time.

    - They believe in Baptism of the dead (some 300,000 Holocaust victims were baptized into Mormonism before a public outcry from the Jewish community put a stop to it).

    - They deny original sin.

    - They believe God has a physical body, as do all spirit beings.

    ...and many more. Put quite simply, Mormonism is an offshoot of Christianity, much in the same way Christianity was an offshoot of Judaism. However, one main difference in the way they spread is that Christianity spread because of persecution, and Mormonism fled because of persecution. 

    The early Mormons removed themselves from society, and when Joseph Smith was killed by a militia in Illinois, the small group of believers elected Brigham Young as their leader, and he led them to Utah, where they grew on their own for some time before moving out and preaching their gospel.

                                                                                       image: whitworthfamily.org

Also, this. 

    The early Christians boldly preached to anyone and everyone who would listen, and even though they were killed by the hundreds, their numbers increased exponentially. Thousands were killed or tortured for their faith just today, yet Christianity is spreading fastest in countries where it is dangerous to be a Christian. 

    I'm not intending to make Mormons sound cowardly, I'm simply making a comparison. And you have to wonder: Why would Christianity spread in the face of persecution, unless it was true? 

    No one will die for a lie that he knows to be a lie. Joseph Smith died jumping out of a window, trying to escape his murderers. If he was so sure of his destiny, as the Christian martyrs were and are, then why not face his assailants with pride and hope?

    Yes, there are many LDS martyrs of recent years. There are also thousands of radical Muslim martyrs of late as well. While no one will die for a lie that he knows is a lie, one might die for a lie he believes to be the truth. This is the crucial difference. Just because some religion has martyrs doesn't mean it's true; it just means that they were made to believe it.

    Obviously, a bunch of people think Mormonism is true. There are nearly 15 million Mormons in the world today, and that number is quickly growing. How are they converting so many, if there are this many things apparently wrong with the belief? 

                                                           image: ldsliving.com

Possibly through their nefarious Mormon cookies.

    I'll tell you how: Miscommunication. Many Mormons think they are Christian because they don't know about these things. They become Mormons because they are looking for hope and a knowledge of the nature of God, and some Mormon missionary just gives them the bare bones of their beliefs. 

    The missionary probably doesn't even mention all the weirder stuff like the temple undergarments or the idea that we're all spirits but don't remember it (because that sounds really similar to Scientology). Essentially, they preach them the Christian Gospel, which is a large part of what Mormon beliefs are based off of. As soon as they decide they want to be Mormon, they are repeatedly told that they are actually Christians, but that other Christians don't think that they're Christians, and that counts as persecution, which is a good thing. 

    Or something.

    Honestly, I'm not sure. That's just my theory. All I do know is that if Mormonism were more believable than Christianity, I'd be a Mormon. I'd say the same about Islam. Or Atheism. Or any other religion. I am a Christian because of evidence and logic.

    In my opinion, Mormonism has neither of those things.

I really love this video. And it's relevant (if not somewhat offensive).

A Letter To Myself of a Few Hours Ago Before My Revelation On Forgiveness

    To Chris,

    As a male, I am an expert at doing stupid things. Specifically, doing stupid things for the attention of females. It doesn't even need to be the kind of attention that possibly implies any sort of romantic feeling; any sort of female attention is good attention as long as they aren't making fun.

    Actually, we'll usually settle for making fun as long as girls acknowledge us.

                                                                                                image: tokitali.blogspot.com

"Ha ha, they NOTICED me!"

    However, I personally refuse to chalk it up to "hormones" or "pheromones", or even the ever so popular "underdeveloped pre-frontal cortex". As unwise as these factors may make young males such as myself, they are no excuse for when we do harmful or hurtful things. 

    As a human being, I am capable of making my own choices, stupid or otherwise. Despite what the occasional dirt bag scientist will tell you, we are not governed completely by biological and environmental impulses. This explanation is a completely intentional dumbing down of the wonderfully complex and mysterious system that is the human consciousness.

    When I've done something that accidentally offends someone, to try and blow it off by saying something like, "What can I say? I'm a guy! I do dumb things. But I'm sorry, I suppose." is a disgustingly sleazy way of attempting to escape the responsibility of owning up to my bad decision. 

    But what happens when you have no idea how deeply you've offended someone? What do you do if your attempted apology fails to suffice? 

                                                         image: roblang.photoshelter.com

And no, fleeing the country is not an option. You're obviously missing the point here.

    Do you hide? Do you avoid contact with this person and cut yourself off from them? Imagine running into this person at a party or some other social event. How awkward would that be? 

    You could always pretend nothing happened, right? Next time you see them, just smile, ask them what's up, and then pretend you don't know what they're grouchy about. To complement this, there's a neat trick where you pull every person aside that you both know and ask them, "What's up with so and so? They seem upset about something. I'm worried about them." That way you distance yourself from the possibility of being involved, AND you seem like you legitimately care to everyone else, so that if the hammer falls and your dispute becomes public, there will more likely be some people to side with you. 

    In case there are actually some people who might try this in a similar scenario, I'd like everyone to be fully aware of the sarcasm I'm attempting to imply. THESE ARE NOT ACTUALLY GOOD IDEAS, AND THEY WILL MAKE YOU INTO A WORSE PERSON.

    No, what you should do is accept that there will be consequences to your actions, even if you think they are unfair. No amount of scheming will completely cover up the hurt and shame of whatever incident you were involved in. Plus, you'll know, and if you're a decent person (which I'm sure you are), you will feel like an ass every time you are reminded of the person you've offended.

                                                      image: therisetothetop.com

    So you were a jerk. You now realize that, and you've apologized. That's pretty much the most you can do. Sure, you can go all out trying extra special hard to please this person, but you know what? That's not you. That's not what you were, and that's not what you want your relationship to be like: A constant struggle to make up for an offense that you may not completely understand until the end of time.

    Instead of trying to be satisfied with your mediocre apology, and in an attempt to avoid a life of guilt and groveling, what you should do is actually apologize to the person. This is different than saying, "I'm sorry. Do you forgive me?" 

    An actual apology is done in person. An actual apology explains your actions without making excuses. An actual apology is done not out of shame but out of humility and an actual desire for reconciliation. An actual apology does not assume a clean slate, but is an offer to try and rekindle what you had before the offense was committed. 

    So get on that, you twerp. I'm tired of feeling awful about myself.

    Sincerely,

    An Enlightened You (From the Future!)